Thursday, August 24, 2006

Dunne vs. Tracy: The Liberal Dilemma


Holy shit, liberals never had it this bad. You can feel the sweat running down their ass cheeks over the upcoming Democratic primary between liberal Matt Dunne and liberal John Tracy. Besides, as Snarky has pointed out before (click here), they're both so damn cute!

The two "went at it" this morning on Mark Johnson's radio show that is -- interesting enough -- called the Mark Johnson Show. How in the hell did he think of that? But as much as they tried to be different, by the end, all we knew is that they are more the same. Let's face it, radio ain't gonna settle this one. These boys need to go to television so Democrats can get to what really differentiates the two: their smiles, their size and their charm.

And one thing's for sure, neither is pulling the old primary game of running to the left for a Democratic primary so as to get the so-called activists voters. Take, for example, the issue of health care. Both Dunne and Tracy think the legislature made a "great first step" with the legislation that Governor Jim Douglas all but forced them to pass. And, unfortunately, they did, thus killing the one and only issue the Dems had in getting rid of Douglas (yes, that was Douglas laughing all the way to re-election when he saw the Dems bend over so far as to break on this one).

I listened to as much of the debate as I could today and I can't think of one issue where there was serious disagreement. In fact, I thought Mark Johnson was going to announce that the two were just going to seal the deal with one of those famous Vermont Civil Unions and run as a couple.

But there was no such luck for the liberals. So now they have to actually make a choice. Worse, they have to pretend to make a choice since there really isn't any, which is probably worse. And we all know how damn hard it is for Vermont liberals to actually take a stand that might be -- oh shit! -- divisive!

But, rest assured, it hardly matters. Because the good Progressive doctor, Marvin Malek, is going to run circles around these two Democratic bland brothers on the issue of health care, stealing more than enough votes to let incumbent Brian Dubie stroll to re-election. And we all know who to blame for that one, don't we: Yep, Mr. Confused Liberal, himself, Anthony Pollina.

Poor liberals, this one must really hurt.