Friday, February 23, 2007

Beaudry Steps Off the Edge, Flails Wildly, Sounds Foolish & Vindictive, and Calls it Just Another Day at the Office

Lucky you. I got kicked out of the job site early today. The lovely homeowners were “entertaining” this weekend and the grandkids were due to arrive this afternoon. You know the old rule: Never let the kids or grandkids see the hired help. I mean, come on, I could say or do something completely inappropriate. I just hope the little rugrats like the “butter rum” color of the living room. Poor kids, they’ll be inhaling the same fumes I’ve been inhaling all week. And the next thing you know, they’ll be checking YouTube for the latest Slipknot videos, looking longingly in the window of Charlie O’s at completely inappropriate times of the day, and – sooner or later – figuring out how damn easy it is to start a blog and drive the power elite bonkers. Hmm, one can only hope.

While working this morning, I was left alone long enough in the house to be able to turn on my radio and listen to WDEV for the first time in a couple of weeks. Wow, it didn’t take long for True North Radio’s Paul Beaudry to come ever-so-closer to the edge of sanity, did it? Ouch. Poor fella. He’s really losing it.

In case you missed it, Beaudry’s convinced that Outright Vermont, the gay and lesbian advocacy group, is on a mission to snatch up his and everyone else’s children and “convert them to the gay and lesbian lifestyle.” And he’s not kidding.

For those of us further along in our post-simian evolution, we firmly understand that Outright Vermont is simply about offering support to gays and lesbians and fighting the kinds of insidiously stupid accusations like those being made by the likes of Beaudry and his clan of knuckle-dragging ninnies.

I mean, come on: How in the hell does he think people can be “recruited to the gay and lesbian lifestyle”? You’ve either got the urge or you don’t. Besides, if there’s any kind of recruiting going on in our culture when it comes to a sexual lifestyle, it’s the heteroes leading that charge. Don’t believe me? Turn on the tube, open a magazine or newspaper, watch an advertisement for, say, beer, or, better yet, seek out any and all the news you can find about Anna Nicole Smith or Brittany Spears. As a Snarky Boy, I’m certain that they’re recruiting me to think about my groin while watching this crap.

This “recruit” nonsense is almost as dumb as the notion that these same people have about “curing” gays and lesbians. Yeah right. And the real scary thing about hearing Beaudry’s hate mongering on this is that he always prefaces his comments by declaring his “love” for “those people.” Sure, Paul, you love them so much that you want to “cure” them of their own love urges. Get a life. And get out of their lives.

Beaudry started flying his anti-Outright Vermont flag when he learned that they had been invited to give a presentation at the school in which his children attend. Gasp! In his simple mind, this meant that the school board, principal, teachers and – yes – students invited them to the school to offer some fertile recruiting ground. But if he’d take just a second to put a coherent thought together, he’d see that the Outright Vermont presentations for schools are about anti-discrimination, understanding and tolerance. Ironic, isn’t it, that Beaudry’s own reaction to the news that Outright Vermont was coming to his children’s school is the best proof yet that the presentations are needed. Me thinks Paul needs to attend. And badly.

The Burlington Free Press picked up on Beaudry’s anti-Outright Vermont tirade in an article in this morning’s edition. Here’s the best quote of the article from Beaudry: “I have friends who are gay and lesbians.”

Well, as we know from our nation’s not-so-distant racist and sexist past, when those kinds of lines start coming out of people’s mouths you know that they’re probably covering up for some pretty nasty notions lingering in their minds.

It wasn’t too long ago when it was common for people to say just as stupid things about blacks and Jews, for example. And it went something like this: “Some of my best friends are blacks. I just don’t want them recruiting my daughter for marriage.” And when the civil rights groups went to the south to preach integration, understanding and tolerance, the Beaudry’s of the world saw it as an invasion, a threat, and little more than a “recruitment” mission.

You’d think we’d all know better by now. But, as Beaudry’s proving, we don’t. And I, for one, am thankful for the fine folks at Outright Vermont who don’t flinch while they’re on the frontlines of yet another battle for inclusion. Bravo to you all.

It’s hard to know fact from fiction when it comes to Beaudry’s hysteria. He is, for example, making all kinds of paranoid accusations against anyone and everyone who thinks differently than him. Unfortunately, I’m all-too familiar with his very bad aim when it comes to his scatter-shot accusation. Because, as you’ll recall, Beaudry and his wife made some wild accusations about Snarky Boy that she eventually apologized for.

So when Beaudry’s now going on the air and breathlessly proclaiming that his tires have been slashed and he’s blaming Outright Vermont, I have to wonder how far his paranoid imagination is taking him. Let me say, though, that if it’s true that his tires were slashed, whoever did it should be ashamed, caught and prosecuted. But it is beyond reckless for Beaudry to take to the airwaves and accuse a very upstanding group of doing something so completely contrary to its mission. That’s called slander. If Beaudry’s got the facts, speak ‘em. But if it’s just conjecture –well – shut the hell up and stop fanning the flames of hate and intolerance.

It’s also very curious that each time Beaudry rants about being victimized, he includes a lengthy call for people to send him money to support his financially struggling radio show. After today’s bizarre performance, he even went so far as to ask “everyone listening to send $20 a month to the show.”

If that sounds familiar, just think back to the Jim & Tammy Faye Bakker days of televangelists. You remember them, right? If not, they were the ones who feigned a peculiar strain of sainthood and victimhood, bamboozled millions from gullible viewers and ultimately had to tearfully repent for being nothing but scam artists.

Yeah, Paul, we’ve seen your routine. And it ain’t pretty.

This whole episode should be a lesson to Vermonters about how far we have to go before true tolerance and inclusion can be a reality for ALL of us. Let’s hope the Beaudrys of Vermont will actually tone down their screaming long enough to attend an Outright Vermont workshop and learn a little something about truly loving your neighbors. Similarly, I hope everyone opposing Beaudry and his wingnut views will do so in a manner that is creative, effective AND legal. We do, you know, have reason on our side.

Snark on.