Monday, February 12, 2007

The Beaudry's of True North Radio Go Bonkers [updated below]

Can a painter ever get some rest? For crying out loud, you people are driving me nuts with tips, quips, requests and – yes – whacky-assed threats. Okay, okay, I’m loving it. But after a hellishly long day of scraping lead paint from some slumlord’s apartments, I came home tonight to what’s becoming the norm: an email box jammed with goodies from you, dear – and not-so-dear – readers.

The most entertaining was from the irate wife of Paul Beaudry of True North Radio. While I normally don’t like to share private emails with my ever-growing readership (and I won’t, by the way, if you request as much), but this one contained a not-so-subtle threat that I felt needed to be exposed.

Before I let you taste the entirety of Joan Beaudry’s snarling email, let me tell you this: I have no idea who she is. And, until this email, I never knew she existed. Nor do I care who she is. But, as is the case with the not-so-sleuthy Paul, she’s misfiring on this one. Big time. Perhaps we should cut her some slack, though, because she is married to a guy who still thinks there were weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Poor woman.

So, without further adieu, here’s Mrs. Paul Beaudry’s email to the Snarky Boy:

Open letter to Snarky Boy to be read on the radio tomorrow regarding to the derogatory remark you made about me in a letter sent to numerous sources.

First let me set the record straight and “substantiate” something for you. There are or should not be any unsubstantiated rumors circulating around Swanton as what you have written is untrue. Unfortunately I am compelled to defend myself which really aggravates me, but as it is my character you are attempting to assassinate, I feel have no other recourse. At the time I began my relationship with Paul, I was LEGALLY separated from my first husband. We would have been divorced at this time but due to the fact that we had to attend classes on helping our child cope with divorce, our divorce date was pushed back. We had not been living together for almost 1 1⁄2 years and in fact my ex was also dating someone. In addition, my ex-husband knew of the relationship as I introduced Paul to him shortly after it began. Thus there are no rumors as there was nothing to start a rumor about.

I will be honest here; your attack on me was uncalled for. Paul is in the public arena, which unfortunately opens him up to attacks from nutcases across the state. I am not in this forum so would appreciate being left out of your attacks. In fact, the only public speaking I do is to teenagers to warn them of the dangers of drinking and driving as my son was killed by a drunk driver in 1998. Letters such as the one you wrote defame my character and could jeopardize the work I do to save lives. This is not acceptable! If this is not enough to appeal to your human side, then consider doing this for my daughter. You upset her dreadfully and this is where I take exception. There is nothing fiercer than a lioness protecting her cub. I hope that within the “recesses of a sometimes fertile but most of the time juvenile mind” there still lingers a flicker of compassion towards those who are innocent and undeserving of your snarky comments.

I am not laughing!

-- Joan

Oh Joan, I’ve got lots of compassion – just not for those who can’t shoot straight. And you clearly missed on this widely scattered shot. Quite frankly, you’ve now got the award for the most bizarre accusation against Snarky Boy, a title that was formerly held by the good Democrat, Odum, who once insinuated that Snarky Boy might be responsible for stealing spare change from his car. Ah, I love the paranoid lunatics on the left and the right. They give me so much fodder.

But let’s get back to the email. I thought long and hard about how to respond. At first I penned an honest denial. Then, I stopped myself from hitting the send button with thoughts of a very funny True North Radio show to look forward to. You know the old adage: Any publicity is good publicity. But then I came back around and sent this response to Joan:

Hello Joan,

Well, thanks for all the information but I have no idea what you're talking about. And, moreover, I have no idea who you are -- nor do I care, quite frankly.

Hear this: Everything I've written about Paul is on my blog site. I would never waste my time "circulating letters" about him because, well, I already have a very wide audience on Al Gore's Internet.

If this is how Paul does his homework, I now see why he's so wrong on almost every issue he talks about.

I know this may be hard for you to hear but: It ain't me, babe, I ain't the one you're looking for.

But go ahead and read the letter on the air. I'd love the publicity.

-- Snarky Boy

Quite frankly, this all smells of Paul’s lunatic and paranoid politics. I guarantee that in his rather demented mind -- where all gays are trying to seduce our children, judges are trying to help them, Bill O’Reilly sits at the right hand of his God, the NEA is run by Castro, Bill Sayer is interesting and Rob Roper is a good selection to head the Vermont Republican Party – Paul is living a great and delusional fantasy whereby he’s George Bush and Snarky Boy is Osama. Let’s face it, this crazy bastard lives for this kind of crap.

Poor guy. Or, better yet, Poor Joan.

Stay tuned.

[Morning Update: That was a weird night. I spent a good chunk of it corresponding with Mrs. Paul Beaudry, trying to get to the bottom of what started as the bizarre accusation outlined above. She finally let me know that she was accusing me of circulating a letter about Paul and his family because the person doing it actually signed it as “Snarky Boy” and encouraged folks to visit this site. Let me be clear: I may be snarky, but I aim my snark at those who willingly put themselves in the public eye – like Paul, not his wife. So let me say this to the person using the Snarky Boy name who is NOT Snarky Boy: Stop it. And, better yet, aim your wrath where it belongs: at Paul and his wingnut politics, not his family. Moreover, do it in a name of your choice, not mine, please.

And thanks, Joan, for the nice dialogue. I wish you the best. – Snarky Boy]